Thursday, August 5, 2004

What does

As some people know I had a hysterectomy in January. Now you would think I no longer had PMS. WRONG!!!!!!!! If you have an ovary you STILL get PMS. I got this in the mail today and LOL it is PMS time for me.   The 13 Things PMS Stands For:

1. Pass My Shotgun

2. Psychotic Mood Shift

3. Perpetual Munching <?XML:NAMESPACE PREFIX = ST1 /><ST1:PLACE>Spree</ST1:PLACE>
4. Puffy Mid-Section

5. People Make me Sick

6. Provide Me with Sweets

7. Pardon My Sobbing

8. Pimples May Surface

9. Pass My Sweatpants

10. Pissy Mood Syndrome

11. Plainly; Men Suck

12. Pack My Stuff

And my favorite one...

13. Potential Murder Suspect

This is for all the mates of us PMSers:

THE HORMONE WARNING:

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the month when all a mate has to do is open their mouth and they takes their life in their own hands! This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver's license in the wallet of every spouse, boyfriend, or significant other!

 

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?

SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?

SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?

ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

 

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?

SAFER: Wow, you look good in brown.

SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!

ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

 

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?

SAFER: Could we be overreacting?

SAFEST: Here's my paycheck.

ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

 

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?

SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.

SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?

ULTRASAFE: Have some chocolate

 

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?

SAFER: I hope you didn't over-do it today.

SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!

ULTRASAFE: Have some more chocolate.

11 comments:

  1. Gotta love those...he he he

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  2. This is hysterical!

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  3. I Like the quote below and I am PMSing and gong to share thes with my family !!!!!!!! Lori

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  4. OHHH, THAT WAS TOO FUNNY!! I TOO WOULD LIKE TO SEND THAT OUT TO FRIENDS AND FAMILY. HOPE THATS ALRIGHT!! I WILL BE CHECKING YOUR JOURNAL OFTEN. LOVE IT!!
    KIM.

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  5. Wait....... you had a hysterectomy and you are still having PMS?????? Crap.... I was holding out one last hope in my back pocket. God had to be a man, didn't he??? Loved your post.

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  6. I'm glad you're sharing your thoughts about your hysterectomy.  I had mine two years ago and I'm still not over it.  I wrote a collection of short stories about it because I thought I was going mad, and writing the stories helped to pull me throught it.  They look at some of the more serious aspects of going through a hysterectomy.  The title story, "Blue Velvis" just came out (August 2004) in a magazine called THE SUN.  Lots of libraries subscribe to THE SUN, so if you're in the library sometime, maybe you could check it out.  They are publishing 3 of the stories.  Like I said, it's a tough road, so I'm glad women like you are getting it out into the open.  Blessings--TW

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  7. My mom had a hysterectomy too and she still gets PMS.  (At one time all the PMS in the house linked up.) Believe me,my dad and Austin built a bomb shelter.  

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  8. As long as women have ovaries, they will still get PMS.  What has helped my PMS is making sure I get natural sunlight. It does help. Also chocolate. Lots of chocolate.

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  9. LMAO!!!! Have some chocolate! I love this! Thanks for my first big laugh of the day!!! Hugs to you Celeste ~Ann : )

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  10. This is hilarious!! Really good stuff!! And true too!

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