I am having trouble sleeping tonight. Been awhile since I had a sleepless night.Things are a bit high tension around here right now.There is stuff going on that I am not ready to talk about and there is stuff going on that I am ready to talk about.
Thursday, Pat and I leave for Indiana to pick up his mother. She will be staying with us until all the utilities are turned back on at her house. Then I will have to go there and clean it up. Her daughter kind of trashed the place and of course no one else in the family can see beyond their own ass to do anything about it. After she gets back home, I will be cooking her meals and taking them to her. She has a daughter that lives a block away that does nothing except take from her. This family is so dyfunctional that if I wrote everything I know about them, no one would believe it.
I will do what the daughters should do. I will bite my tongue once again when members of that family trashtalk me. I will endure the abuse that I will get. I will not allow her to go hungry or live in filth. At least not while she is alone. If daughter J starts coming back around..................
I will only be able to take so much. I do have a breaking point. Unfortunately, my breaking point causes me to meltdown and I start destroying my life. I do not handle emotional stress good. I used to run away in the past. I am 46 years old now and have no where to run to now. Sometimes I do wish I did not exist. Don't worry. That does not mean I have suicidal thoughts.