I was reading a journal of someone that I have come to know through her blog and she was talking about why she writes and it got me to thinking. I started this because of an online friend. She has a journal and sent me a link. I started reading hers and thought that this was neat so I started my own. I never had a diary when I was younger, never wrote in a journal. The only writing I ever did was for assignments in school. I enjoyed writing but I never thought that I was good at it. Reading was my best subject. I would compare my writing to theirs and mine would come up short. I have always been my worst critic in everything I have ever done. I need to do this. I need to allow myself to express myself some how. Most days I do not have any conversation at all. There is only so much that you can say to a 6 year old. My hunny and I lately cannot have much of a conversation without it turning into a disagreement. I need to share with someone. My family is.... well they are not here for me. One of my sisters lives 20 miles from me but we do not see each other. I have no relationship with any of my family. I love them because they are my family. I do not know where any of them live. I have their phone numbers but I do not know what to say to them. My mama died and all ties broke. If I was to die tonight who would be at my funeral? Yes they would probally show up for that. Maybe. I only know of 5 people that would truly grieve for me. I'm wandering around in my head now, rambling and feeling sorry for myself. I guess I just needed a good cry.