Saturday, May 12, 2007

mothers day

Tomorrow is Mother's Day. Back when I was a little girl, I had nice memories of Mother's Day. We would get up on Sunday morning and have breakfast and get ready forchurch, usually wearing our Easter dresses. After that we would go out in the back yard to the rose bushes growing next to the old wooden fence. These were special bushes planted by my grandmother, old heirloom roses.Wewould look for our own special rose to wear. Red roses for everyone except daddy, he got a white one. You wore a red rose if your mama was alive and a white rose for if they were no longer with us. I was always amazed that the roses were blooming every year right on time. We would pin our roses on and then go to church. Some of the ladies at church would wear fancy rose corsages. I would see them and would wish out loud that I wish my mama had one. She told me that her was the sweetest. At church they would give out flowers plants for the oldest mama, the one with the most kids at church, the youngest mama(which I won one year), and the one with the youngest baby. After church we would come home to a meal that Mama had put in the oven before church. Afterwards we would just play or whatever. Mama would not go anywhere on that day until my oldest sister called. She would stay in the house because she might not hear the phone ring. Everytime it rang she would have someone get the phone. If it was not her she would look so sad. When the call finally came through she would be all smiles and laugh. (My next sister up laughs like my mama)
I miss those times. Life was so much simpler, at least it was for me. I know now that it was not easy for them. I know it was a struggle for them. I was not exactly what they wanted for Mother's Day the year I was born. Life was supposed to start getting easier not harder. Life moved on. There were death and births. MOther's Day became a distant memory. I became a mother and no one celebrated with me, time passed and my baby became a mother.  I made sure that her baby would have something for her mother every year. Then came the year when they were no longer together. I had my grandbaby with me and suddently Mother's Day became special. I had someone bringing me flowers and pictures and cards that she made. Now my daughter has her back again. She is the one to get the gifts now. And now finally after years of dreading the holiday, because something bad always happened around that time, my daughter is celebrating it with me.
I wasted so many times that I could have spent with my mama. Not going to see her because I was ashamed of how my life was and other reasons that are truely meaningless as I look back. So many times I had wished I had never been born and now when I see Brook I know WHY I was born.

14 comments:

  1. I enjoyed reading your memories. Wishing you a very nice Mother's Day. Paula

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  2. I hope this Mother's Day is good for you.
    Pam

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  3. you are doubly blessed...enjoy your Mother's Day.....I know you mean the world to your daughter and grand daughter....
    take care
    Ellie

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  4. Times were definitely simpler then.

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  5. Oh Celeste I hope you won't be sad, your smile is too beautiful,remember your not alone we all have good, bad and sad memories, it sounds your memories of the rose bush was a great one, concentrate on all the good memories, put the bad,sad one in a bag and toss them in the garbage.  Jackie gg

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  6. awww Celeste...it was good to read your memories...and I was saddened too...but knowing you now ... thru this journal...I hope that your Mother's Day is happy and full of sunshine....if no one comes forth with celebrations with you...just remember this lady in KY who will be thinking of you and wishing the best of it all...God Bless....hugs...Ora

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  7. It's amazing when you look back on what for you was a simple happy time and see it thru adult eyes and realize just what your parents where going thru. We laugh because some of my favorite food dishes are things that mom made because they were inexpensive and filling. Still, to me now these many years later they are comfort food that reminds me of when things were simpler (well, at least for me!<g>)

    Happy Mother's Day!
    http://journals.aol.com/astaryth/AdventuresofanEclecticMind/
    http://adventuresofaneclecticmind.blogspot.com/

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  8. Celeste
    Looking back is a good thing to do to learn from our mistakes.  Looking back to dwell on regrets and what ifs is not good.  I am glad you were born, I wouldn't have you as a friend had you not been.  Life is so precious and fragile.  And now you get to celebrate it with your daughter and Brook.  Things are good.  Happy Mother's Day my friend.!

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  9. CELESTE...YOU HAVE BEEN A MAMA NOT ONLY TO YOUR DAUGHTER BUT TO YOUR GRANDAUGHTER TOO...AND YES...NOW YOU KNOW WHAT GD HAD PLANNED FOR YOU ALL ALONG!
    HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY FRIEND.
    LOVE YA,
    CARLENE

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  10. Perfectly said.  The realization you shared in the last sentence was a gift to yourself!

    Happy Mother's Day, Celeste

    Russ

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  11. Wow, what wonderful memories of Mother's Day, in that "simpler time." I just wish ou could have been celebrated the way you deserved all along. We all have our regrets-my mom blew Mother's Day off, and so I didn't celebrate with her nearly enough- but I am glad that you have been able to reunite with youir daughter and have good Mother's Days now. You have done a lot to deserve this, and I am glad for you. Margo

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  12. ""You wore a red rose if your mama was alive and a white rose for if they were no longer with us. ""

    I had completely forgotten this part of my childhood!  Thank you for reminding me!

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  13. I remember that!  I had forgotten til you wrote about it...Will have to remember that now and tell my kids about it...Hope you had a good Mother's day!  Hugs,TerryAnn

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  14. You have some wonder memories of your childhood. This is what keeps us going when we wonder why to everything. The Lord is good and He knows what he is doing, even if at the time we don't.  I hope you had a wonderful Mother's day

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