Learning to let go of my anger is hard. Anger sucks. It makes me so sick. I am not talking about simple anger but a deep rage, the kind that can lead you to doing things and saying things that should never be said or done. Most times I rage when I am by myself then the tears come and I can bring myself under control. Last night was one of those times.
Brook is on her way to Panama City Florida. I know she is having a grand time.The people she is with spoil her and pet on her. LOL It has been years since I have been there. Someday I hope to go there again.
I was talking on the phone earlier today and the person I was talking asked me what that sound was they were hearing. I told her that it was my birds singing. She asked me if I found it annoying because they were so loud. My honest answer was never. Being hearing impaired you really learn to appreciate everything you do hear. It is amazing to me to hear them at all. Actually there is only one I
can hear and I cannot hear his whole song. I watch him sing and find
such joy in hearing what I do. The day may come where I will not hear
that so I treasure the days I have.
We are getting some much needed rain right now. The thunder is rolling and the lightening strikes are hitting all around. The temps have dropped to a pleasant 72 down from the 93 it was an hour ago. I need to get off now. The lights dimmed. Out here in the country the power can go off at anytime.
Today is blah. Been alone all day it seems. Brook is in Florida and I am here all alone. The rest of the week will be like this.
My Buddy thinks he is suppose to lay on the mouse pad in front of the computer when I am online. He is suppose to get all of my attention! LOL
The weekend went mostly good. Friday we rode the bike for a couple hours and headed out to fireworks. We did not stay and just went home. We got to see many firework displays from the house without the smoke.
Saturday evening things started falling apart. Sunday was for the birds. Monday was not much better. Today is better. I know there will be ups and downs. I am counting on more ups than downs.
On a positive note I have lost down from 198 on June 1 to 185 today. I will take whatever small things that I can find in a day.
I have 8 baby chicks running around the yard right now. My little red hen is setting a nest now. I am not sure how many she has under her.
Ok I am out of here right now. I need to get busy. I have a goal to reach with my cleaning and I cannot do it sitting here. Love you all.
Things are looking mostly up. I am keeping a happy attitude no matter what happens. I have to pick the right battles to do and right now I do not see any reason whatso ever to open my mouth and ruin the peace we are having right now. I know that I have a long way to go. I also know that if anything is to change I must first change things within myself. And don't give me that you don't need to change anything. Believe me, you do not live with me, I need to change some things. Heck if I don't like me how can anyone else? This has been a good week for the horses. Every evening they have been rode by Nickie and Brook. It has been great for the horses especially Precious. She is so fat. It takes her away from the field for 3 hours and gives her plenty of exercise. It is good for Brook too. She is riding with someone close to her age(14) and she is getting more adventurous about getting the horse to go faster without fear of falling off. She is even riding bareback! It is something to see her riding and racking the horse. LOL Yesterday she started slipping off but it turned out fine. She reached up and grabbed Precious around the neck and Precious stopped like she hit a brick wall! Brook kept going over but her feet hit the ground from a stopped horse instead of one that was moving on. Tomorrow is the 4th on Brook has a demo to do. She will be at the Freedom Festival here along with the rest of the kids, fireworks following at 9:30. Come and join us.
